wandering mind

I was a little apprehensive about staying in a small town in the suburbs of London. I imagined it similar to my little town in the suburbs of Washington DC. You have to drive everywhere you want to go. All the bars and restaurants close at 9. Good for daily routine, not ideal for vacations. I was so wrong. The little town of Ealing just stole my heart.

Overwhelmed with the love that is pouring in on my milestone birthday. I am so blessed and grateful to have all these people in my life. I feel so content - there is nothing I want to ask for. I am filled with gratitude. Thank you universe!

It was so nice to have Dia home for just one night.  Last night she asked me if she could have some milk. We had run out. This morning she wanted pancakes, we had run out of eggs. Then she wanted to make a naan pizza - we had run out of sauce and shredded cheese. She comments - this is not a kid friendly house anymore. I guess I need to grocery shop before kids come home. 

As I try to design my life the way I want to live it I am coming to a realization that change is easy, lasting change is the hard part. How do you keep it going?

This week I am away from home on a conference and as I sit in this clean hotel room where everything is in perfect order, I miss the chaos of my house. I miss the stuff every where, I miss my family, the shoes by the front door that no one takes the two seconds to put on the shelf, the dishes in the sink that wait for me to rinse them and put them in the dishwasher, the piles of clean laundry. I used to not care about clutter. I clearly remember when I had a clean clothes pile and a dirty clothes pile and how well that system worked. I didn't understand what my mom's problem was. She was always bothered by my clutter, Fast forward 20 years.I have become my mom. I am always yelling at someone to pick up their stuff. Or picking it up myself and mumbling about kids these days. But I miss my home. I want to be wrapped around in it like a comfortable sweater. My imperfect home is the perfect place for me.

I have been working with some like minded people on things like vision statement and goal settings. One of the exercises this week was to create your personal principles - things that you want to live by and don't want to compromise on. This is what I came up with.

We are a family of engineers. I am an engineer, and so is my dad. I married an engineer. His dad happened to be one as well. So imagine our surprise when our daughter decided to be a theater major. Especially since she is really good at math and science. How I made my peace with that is a topic for another discussion. So we were sitting in a family gathering and discussing how my daughter got almost 100% in calculus.  A relative who knew my father in law really well noted that it must come from my daughter’s grandfather. I almost wanted to raise my hand like a little kid and say, “but, but, I also almost always got 100% in Math…” but I didn’t want to take the conversation there. I have tremendous respect for my father in law. He might be one of the most brilliant person I know. Then my daughter chimes in “I think I get it from my mom” My heart filled with something warm and fuzzy